Simply Having a Wonderful Christmas Time

Christmas 2011

It's the afternoon of Christmas, December 25th, 2011.  It has been an interesting year ... but that is for another blog.

I used to have a friends that I would call every year on Christmas day; I won't say his name, but it sounds like Jim  :)  I called him other times of the year, too, and we went out and did stuff, like real friends used to do, before social networking involved computers and the Internet.  But especially on Christmas day, I would phone him and we would compare what we got for presents, what we had for breakfast, what we were having for dinner, and maybe discuss what time we were getting together on Boxing Day.  He was truly my best friend, and remained as such until Stefani and I had been married for a few years.

We lost touch.  After I got married, it was difficult for him to relate to me as a married guy, since we had spent so much time together as single horn-balls, checking out all the girls.  After I got married, he thought that was still cool ... Stefani disagreed  :)  So, we started to drift apart.  Then he got into a serious relationship, and we thought maybe we could start hanging out together again, but as couples, we were not really compatible.  Or maybe we just couldn't get along with his new friend ... anyways, they got hitched, had kids, moved away ... all the things that happen when friends drift apart.

Did I think that we would remain friends forever?  No, I don't think I was ever that naive; but I do miss him.  Maybe it isn't so much the "him" that I miss, but having someone like him in my life was well, kinda cool.  Someone that you could call up and say, dude, let's go for coffee, or grab a movie, or just hang out.  With the wives, without the wives, whatever.  Ya, I miss that.

Throughout my life there have been many Jims, Richards, Aldens, Kevins, etc.  It makes me wonder if I did something wrong.  Did I do something or say something that chased them away?  Yes, in some cases, I did, I know that, and I am sorry.  But in others, it seems like life just kept on moving; forward, sideways, backward ... who knows.  Makes me wonder sometimes if that kind of friendship is just not meant for me...

I have some wonderful friends, and some wonderful people in my life.  Maybe I am just feeling a little nostalgic ... seems to be happening more and more with me lately.

Johnny Cash sings a cool song.  I know it was Beatles that did it originally, but since I am a Cash fan, and not a bug fan, I prefer to credit the Man in Black.

There are places I'll remember
All my life, though some have changed
Some forever, not for better
Some have gone and some remain
All these places had their moments
With lovers and friends, I still can recall
Some are dead and some are living
In my life, I've loved them all

But of all these friends and lovers
There is no one compares with you
And these memories lose their meaning
When I think of love as something new
Though I know I'll never lose affection
For people and things that went before
I know I'll often stop and think about them
In my life, I'll love you more

Though I know I'll never lose affection
For people and things that went before
I know I'll often stop and think about them
In my life, I'll love you more

Kind of sums it up for me.

Merry Christmas everyone!

(P.S. Hey Jim!  Whatja get for Chritsmas?)

Merry Christmas! Happy Thanksgiving!

For what seems like the first time in a couple of years or more, I am actually feeling a little festive, and looking forward to Christmas!  I have been decorating a little bit at work, and even got to buy a few new decorations, since the resident rat ruined all the old tacky ones    At work, I have also been stamping, signing, and stuffing Christmas cards for the last few days, and I believe I have that all under control, with about a hundred Christmas cards ready to mail.  Now, if it would only snow, it would feel like it really IS Christmas!  LOL

On Sunday, we celebrated First Advent.  At some churches, First Advent (and second to fourth advents) is celebrated each week by the lighting of a candle, until the fifth week(Christmas) candle is lit.  We didn’t celebrate it at a church, we celebrated it at Stefani’s parents’ house (like every year).  And we didn’t light a candle, we got gifts    Every year, for a few years now, maybe as long as I can remember (?) Stef’s parents have given gifts to all the kids for First Advent, kind of like a pre-Christmas thing.  This year was no exception.  They put out a few boxes of typical things that you would buy at Costco:  flash lights, tape measures, hammers, screw drivers, dried nuts, dried fruit, syrup, jam, chocolate, cheese, socks, gloves, etc.  Each of us takes a turn picking something from the box, until we have each had a four or five turns.  This year, Dave and Monica and the kids couldn’t make it out, so I set up Skype on the laptop and they joined us virtually.  As always, it was a lot of fun!

So, Thanksgiving just passed us, for those of us that are from the U.S. of A (or want to be).  I know I likely blogged or something about it on the Canadian Thanksgiving, but it’s by blog, so I will do it again.

This year, as with every year, I have a lot to be thankful for.  But especially this year.  My health has improved drastically.  While not every day is pain-free, there are many days that I take one or two Tylenol, along with my regular nerve (not pain)meds. Some days I go totally without, because the pain just isn’t that bad.  I am going for short walks (almost) every day, I am doing Yoga once a week (plus some stretching at home), and I am working around the house and at work to my almost full strength.  That is a lot to be thankful for.  And thanks too for all the prayers; I felt it.  Keep them coming, and maybe we will see a full and complete healing!

For the next few weeks, people are getting to be more and more busy.  Please try and remember WHY we are busy.  This year, take some time out to chill with a friend, maybe someone that you just met, or someone you don’t get together with all the time.  Buy them a coffee, talk about nothing, and bless each other, like we are supposed to every day.

Doug

Winter and Christmas

First, I was going to put up a status on FaceBook. Then, I thought I might post a note on FaceBook. Finally, I decided that I should use my blog once in a while.

It is cold outside. They promised snow, but we didn't get any where we live ... yet. It isn't winter yet; another month for that, but it is close, and the weather is trying to prove it. I am not ready for winter. I don't mean in the way we usually think, winter tires, antifreeze, outside taps shut off, warm clothes out. Those things are taken care of (at least the ones that we want to take care of, i.e. clothes!) No, I am not emotionally ready for winter. I was sort of robbed of my summer here in White Rock. Oh sure, we went for a cruise in the fall and enjoyed some nice hot weather, but we left cold and rainy, and came back to cold and rainy. My summer was spent in bed and in a wheelchair, barely able to move. I couldn't go for a walk on the beach, slosh through the sea grass, snorkel, find crabs, jump off the pier (not that I ever have!), enjoy ice cream melting down my arm ... none of the things that one enjoys in the summer time in White Rock.

Looking back, and seeing where I am at now, I am okay with all of that. Summer is over, but another one is right around the corner. Besides, we will escape winter in February and enjoy a week on the beaches of Oahu, so that is cool.

Still not ready for winter, and maybe it isn't so much winter as Christmas; maybe it isn't so much that, as it is remembering the past. Yes, Mexico (or Oregon, for those of you who were with us then). It has been two years since we found out we were moving there for work, and almost two years since we had the rug pulled out from under our life. they say that time heals all wounds ... the are not correct. I think about it less, and it hurts less, but heal? No, I don't think so, and even if it almost goes away, there will be an ugly scar that will always remind me.

I thank God for what I have, and for the blessings that He continues to pour into our lives. Without His comforting arms around me, I would have lost it. Then, and recently with this back issue. His continued blessing and healing in my life are a constant reminder of how much He loves me.

Thanks for listening, and thanks for your prayers and support.

namaste

It Just Keeps Getting Better!

So, for those of you who do not believe in the power of prayer, and God's healing hand, I want to apologize (sort of) right off the bat ... you might want to stop reading this post ...

It would seem that I am almost normal (loaded statement!), or at least as normal as can be :o) I am completely off the Percocet, and I am working on cutting back on the other meds that I am taking. I thought I would be taking Tylenol like candy, but I am only needing a couple a day ... sometimes I go completely without! (those are usually the lazy days LOL). Go ahead, ask me why! Because I asked God to heal me. Many people asked God to heal me, or to at least give me relief. I got it!

A herniated disc is a pretty serious thing. I mean, hey, I couldn't walk, stand, sit, or barely lie down without pain. I was in so much pain that I was constantly in tears or nearly there. I could not move. I was taking six or seven pills a day, thinking about taking eight or nine. I think the cortisone shot had a lot to do with it, but hey! God created man with a brain, and we chose to use the brain to discover medicine, so He still gets the credit.

I traded my walker for a cane a couple of days ago. I nice black one with some blue coloring on it. I feel weird, and maybe look a little weird, using it, but so what ... it helps. I haven't tried going for a long walk yet. The walker helped that, gave me some support, and allowed me to walk to the pier and back. This afternoon I will see how I do without the walker.

Yes, God heals. Yes, God answers prayer. I am sorry, but I can't go back and test that "theory", but I believe is nonetheless. Call it blind faith, but I don't agree, because "blind" implies that you don't see anything, and I see it every second of every day, and it makes me very aware of what God can do.

This is a little different tune that I am singing these days, in comparison to my July 29th post, but not that different. I believed then, and I believe now.

Thanks for following my blab ... er, blog. I hope that I have inspired you somewhat. And thanks to all who prayed ... I feel you.

Blessings

The Days Go By

We are back from a long vacation. Hmm ... sounds like an intro to some words of wisdom ... sorry, might not happen :)

Anyways, the vacation. For those of you following along with the Facebook and Blog posts of Stefani and me, we have just returned home from a 3 week vacation that included a 15 night Panama cruise. I won't go into the actual vacation; that is all on a different blog, but in a previous post I spoke about some of my worries and fears in regards to the management of my pain during this vacation. I want to say that all went fairly well. There were a few moments that did not go well, but in all, the vacation was not hampered (much). Stefani had a relaxing time, not having to take care of me too much. The others that we were with helped out (thanks guys!). As the days rolled on, I found myself using the wheelchair less and less, and doing more things on my own with the walker, and sometimes even without!

Today I went to see my back surgeon, and he gave me some good news and some bad news. The bad news is, I will never have the back of a 21 year old. The good news is that so far he would rather not put me through surgery, as I seem to be getting better. Hear that? I am getting better! Admittedly, I feel better, too. There are certainly times that I am really sore, and would rather not try moving, but those times are becoming more few and far between. Most of the time I am quite able to get around, slowly, with the support of my walker. Sometimes, I even go without! Usually only in the house, though. The doc says to start getting into more movement exercises, and suggested Pilates or Yoga. Ha ha! Can you see me doing Pilates? Even my family doctor wants pictures of that! LOL

So, slowly, maybe we will see how things go. I find that too much too fast hurts a lot, and causes shooting "pain" in my foot. So, slow and steady wins the race, I guess. I did promise Stefani that I would try and do more around the house, like the old days. I was cleaning in the kitchen this afternoon, and she said how it was nice to hear me in there. Well, it is nice to be able to :)

Let's see what the next weeks bring ...

Getting Better?

July 29th was my first pain-filled blog.

I have been dealing with this back pain for 5 weeks ... seems a lot longer, yet again, it seems like yesterday. No, it doesn't, it seems a lot longer.

The most debilitating part of this ordeal has been the neuropathy, or nerve pain, or phantom pain caused by the pinched nerve in my back. It has caused my left foot and leg to be virtually useless, and I can tell you without a doubt, there is nothing "phantom" about this pain! It is the same pain felt by people who lose a limb, and it really hurts!

On Monday of this week, I went in for what was supposed to be an epidural cortisone injection. This is supposedly the best way to relieve some of the nerve pains in my leg and foot. Well, as to be expected, the doctor was not prepared for this, and thought I was there for a surgery consult. Once we started talking about the pain, and the vacation coming up, etc, he realized he had to do something. Apparently there is a lot of politicking going on in the hospital between surgeons, anesthetists, and administration. The equipment that is needed for the epidural process takes weeks to get, if the surgeon can get it at all. Not to worry, the doc says, let's try this instead. What, I asked, are we "trying"? Cortisone? Lydocaine? Yes, he says ... okay... He gave me a shot, and said it would take 2-3 days, but I should start to feel some relief soon.

Yesterday was 2 days, and I could have argued with him. Didn't really seem a lot better, but this morning I got up for my 3AM pill and bathroom break, and I walked to the bathroom without the use of a walker! And again at 7AM! Today, I have been sitting on my arse, just like every other day, and I feel pretty good. The "pain" in my foot has subsided considerably, and I am able to walk, with a very pronounced limp, and very tenderly. I felt so good, in fact, that I considered walking to Subway for lunch. No, just kidding ... I am not THAT daft!

So, on July 29th, as well as on August 5th, and every day in between and since, I have been crying out to God for some sort of healing. I guess He has chosen to use medicine and science :) I am okay with that, and I chose to give Him the glory.

So, there ya have it. Today is a good day. This evening, I plan on going out the the beach with my wonderful supportive wife, if she wants to. She can push - I am riding :)

Still Coping

Still in pain ...been something like four or five weeks now. I have asked God to heal me, but I am beginning to think He has something else in mind. We've been having a really tough time with doctor's, and the system in general, but God has been blessing us, even through our troubles.
I have heard from many people that things like CT-scans and MRIs take a long time to get, and some people get so tired of being on the waiting list that they either go out of province or they pay at a private center. I do not seem to be cursed with this issue. While in the ER two weeks ago, I went in for a CT scan. It was a Sunday, and they called a technician in for it. The following week I was miraculously scheduled at Peace Arch Hospital for an MRI, which I did not fit in. I was worried that it would take a long time to get scheduled someplace with a newer bigger machine, but within a week I was scheduled at the new Jimmy Pattison Outpatient Centre, and they have a bigger machine. So, something that could have taken months only took a couple of weeks! Why? Prayer, I guess ;-)
But my doctor troubles continued on Friday, as I waited for two hours to see my surgeon, only to be told that I would need to reschedule, as he was called away on an emergency. Stefani, the trooper that she is, talked nicely but sternly to the uncaring receptionist, and as a result of her persistence, I am scheduled for an epidural (nerve block/cortisone?) in a couple of weeks. Hopefuly it works, and relieves the pain, because as Stef keeps reminding me, we are going on a Panama cruise in less than month!!
Wow! Gonna need some major prayer for that one. The cruise will be fine ...it's the six hour flight home from Miami that concerns me. Maybe the ticket counter will have pity on me and offer me a free upgrade to first class :-) hey, I can dream ...
So, life goes on. Really, the worst part of this situation is the extra work that my darling wife has to do. Turns out, I actually did some stuff around the house when I was okay, before all this. She is not as exhausted now, and she smiles a bit more, but I can't help feeling aweful. Really, friends, we need company. Offer to bring over dinner ...pizza, Wok Box, Costco salad ...we don't care. Dessert even, just get off your knees for a couple of hours and come and visit! It's not that we don't appreciate your prayers, we do, and I have felt comforted by them often, but we have really appeciated it when people come over. Okay, enough whining ...I should not have to beg.

Thanks